Following Jesus Read online

  “Are you going to finally throw the Romans out and get some power going here?”

  “Are you going to get this thing organized?”

  Jesus breaks right through it and opens a whole new world. He says, “Follow me. Don’t be afraid. I will make you catch people. I will introduce you to a completely new way of living and being” (Mark 1:17).

  They leave everything behind and follow Jesus.

  In our own lives, we hold on to our logic. Jesus wants to break through it and open up a new way of being. We are afraid to let this happen to us because then we don’t have control anymore. We don’t have control over our future when we let Jesus enter into the center of our being.

  We have to trust a direction for which we don’t have a language. Jesus uses words like “breath,” “life,” “death,” and “truth,” but he imbues them with new meaning. The disciples don’t understand and get confused. Only much later when the Spirit comes do the real meanings of these words become visible.

  We Are Called

  Jesus calls us to move away from the world of scarcity and from a way of thinking about scarcity, to a world of abundance and to a way of thinking about abundance. The disciples had a mentality of scarcity, and so do we. We think there is not enough for everyone so we have to be careful with what we have. We are fearful people. We are very afraid, and that fear creeps up on us in all kinds of ways.

  We are afraid for ourselves. We are afraid of others. We are afraid of God. Fear is a pervasive quality in our lives. Fear makes us think in terms of scarcity. It makes us think, “This is a dangerous world. How am I going to survive? There is not enough for everyone. There is not enough food for everyone. There is not enough knowledge for everyone. There is not enough affection and I want to live! I want to be sure that I live! I want to stay alive!” This is a very common response in us.

  When we are concerned that there isn’t enough, our first response is to start hoarding. We start hoarding the bread, the fish. Hoarding honor. Hoarding affection, hoarding knowledge. Hoarding ideas.

  If we start hoarding we find ourselves with enemies.

  There are always people who will say, “You have much more than me.” You might say, “I know, but I need it for emergency situations.” They respond, “But I need it now. I am hungry now.” “I want to know this now.” “I want to build this now.”

  If we think with a scarcity mentality we find ourselves with enemies who want to take some of what we have hoarded. We are more and more afraid, because the more we have, the more people want our surplus. The more surplus we have, the more we are going to build walls around what we have hoarded.

  The higher the walls get, the more fear we have of the enemies we imagine outside the walls. We start building bombs to protect us from our imagined enemies, and then we get scared of the bombs that our enemies might build in retaliation. We find ourselves in a prison that we built ourselves because of a fear that comes out of a mentality of scarcity. Of not having enough.

  Think about it. How do you hold on to things?

  Like holding on to a relationship, for instance.

  “This is my friend. I am not going to invite him because the others will like him more than they like me and I don’t want to be alone.”

  You are holding on to that friend and not letting go.

  Scarcity mentality is very visible in the Gospel. Jesus is saying that God is the God of abundance. Wherever Jesus appears there is not only life but life to the full.

  Jesus comes to bring life, and life to the full. He brings much more than we even ask for. Jesus always offers us something beyond our expectations. The reality that Jesus keeps promising is a reality that we can’t even grasp. He speaks about eternal life, the truth, the light, the life.

  Jesus’ miracles are signs of a new reality. He says, “Do you remember how much bread was left over? You still don’t believe?” Jesus gets almost desperate and says, “How can I make you believe that you can trust me? How can I make you believe that with me you will not lack for anything?” Even after the resurrection, the disciples don’t grasp the new reality. Peter says, “Let’s go back fishing. The Lord is gone. It’s all over.” They are back fishing and suddenly they see a figure on the shore and the person calls out, “Did you catch anything?” And they say, “No, we didn’t.” “Well, throw out your nets again on the left side.” They do, and suddenly they have all this fish. John turns to Peter and says, “It is the Lord.” Peter then jumps into the sea and makes his way toward Jesus (John 21:7).

  The Lord gives more than we can deal with. That is what finally makes the disciples see. Even though the disciples can’t fully understand what it all means, the signs are so powerful that, indeed, they finally leave their nets and follow.

  Following Jesus, as described in the Gospels, is first of all an invitation to follow the Lord of abundance. We are invited to follow the Lord even if we can’t fully absorb the enormousness of this divine hospitality.

  I hope you see what I am saying. Fear is precisely what makes us hold on to our position and possessions. It makes us hold on to what we have, because we are so afraid we will lose what we need. Love is overcoming fear. Love is letting go and trusting that in the letting go life will multiply. Life will become more.

  “Follow me. Let go of your logic. Let go of your way of thinking. Let go of your fears and trust that something new will happen. You will enter into the Kingdom of abundance, of joy, of peace, of freedom.” We say, “Yes, but listen. Let’s not go too quickly. Let’s work it out. Let’s see what we are in for.”

  We don’t quite trust.

  Jesus says, “Follow me. Look at me. Didn’t you see the fish? Didn’t you see the bread? You still have all your arguments. You are still fighting. You feel unhappy. You are not content. You are afraid. You are in a prison that you built yourself. You are worried, and I say, ‘Follow me,’ and you are still arguing.” We say, “I don’t know if I can let go. I know the fear I have and I don’t know the love.”

  We know the pain. We are less familiar with the love. What do we do? We choose the pain. We hold on to our ways because we don’t know what it would mean to let them go. “Follow me” means “Let go of those fears.” Jesus says, “Think about the Kingdom first and all the other things you are so worried about will fall into place. Why are you so worried? Why are you so preoccupied? Why are you so afraid? I would like to make you free. I would like you to follow the Lord in whose presence there is life. I want to give you life. If you hold on to your own things you get enemies. You get walls. You get death. There is destruction, war, and violence. But I am the Lord of life. Choose life! Choose me in whose presence there is abundance!”

  How Do We Respond?

  By letting go, by giving away! Five loaves, two fish. They multiply in the giving. There is enough for everyone. What we hold on to always diminishes. What we give away always multiplies. It is the great illogic. The poor will possess the land. Those who give away what they have will see it multiply. Those who hold on to it in fear will see it dwindle right in front of them.

  This happens in my life. If I hold on to a friend or if I hold on to an idea, I find myself anxious and nervous. Why do I choose this? Do something different! Something happens. Something totally new.

  Our response to the call to follow Jesus can be very concrete. Our response is to take small steps away from “me” and “my fears” toward the Lord.

  Following does not require dramatic gestures.

  I am amazed by the number of people who ask the big questions when they already know the small answers. Some people ask me, “Should I really leave it all behind and go on a mission? Is that what Jesus is asking?” “Do I really need to leave my family and my career and give up all my possessions to follow Jesus?” I respond, “Why ask the big questions when you could simply say, ‘I promise not to yell at m
y baby. I promise to make a little step.’ ”

  The great secret of the spiritual life is that you already know the little steps, even if you don’t know the big ones. You don’t need to know the big steps to take the little steps. You only have to take one step at a time. The interesting thing is that the person who is in touch with the Lord knows what those little steps are. For example, we could say, “I am not going to speak about that person that way anymore. I am not going to gossip.” It is a little thing. Nobody notices. We still don’t like that person, but at least we are not going to say bad things about them anymore. Little step. The next step might be that we smile at them. Then we invite them over. Before we know it we are friends. If we look back we see it was a long journey of little steps.

  All the great people in history started with little steps. St. Francis of Assisi didn’t suddenly rip off his clothes and move to a cave. It was four years of struggling and taking little steps. He asked himself, “What should I think?” “How should I act?” He worked it out in little steps. We focus on the dramatic end of it all, but that is not what I want you to pay attention to. Focus on the small steps he took to get there.

  Be very aware. You know exactly what you have to do tonight. You also know what you have to do tomorrow. You also know what you don’t need to do. You have to trust that if you take these steps of faithfulness in your thinking, in your speaking, in your acting, you can make a long trip with small steps. You will hear the call louder and louder and know where you are going.

  I don’t want to make it sound too easy.

  Somehow we must trust that all the steps we need to take are close at hand. Jesus doesn’t ask us to jump. He asks us first to move, very, very carefully, step by step by step.

  The first step is to listen.

  The second is to step away from “mine.” When making decisions we can ask ourselves, “Am I doing this out of fear for my survival or can I act in trust?” We will know when we are acting out of fear and when we are acting out of love. Always choose love. Do not act out of fear. Again it is small changes: don’t say or think things because you’re scared. Thinking thoughts of fear leads to more fear.

  Following Jesus is moving away from fear and toward love. Always toward the Lord.

  It is crucial that we step away from fear and toward the One who is Love (1 John 4:8). We must keep our eyes on the Lord of abundance. Jesus is the one who promises life, and life to the full. He doesn’t say, “I am going to make life difficult for you.” He talks about detachment and letting go, but that is only later. First of all, he speaks about moving toward life. He says, “Follow me and keep your eyes on that place that promises you life to the full.”

  Use prayer and meditation to keep your eyes on that place of life.

  If you want to develop the spiritual life keep the Lord in your mind. Look at him.

  St. Ignatius of Loyola would say, “See him, hear him, touch him, taste him, smell him.” Be fully present and become familiar. Always stay close to the invitation “Come and see,” because if you really see, if you really look around, and you really become familiar with the beauty of Jesus, you will see that the beauty of this person is his invitation to love. It is an invitation to go where he calls. Then it will be easy.

  Perhaps “easy” is not quite the right word. It is something we do because we are attracted to it. The spiritual life is not giving up something. It is first of all following the One. It is not first of all letting go of all fears. It is first of all being led to love. If we keep the Lord, his Kingdom, his Word, and his Gospel in our mind, if this becomes our inner space, we will know what to do because we have that world around us. We are in the House of the Lord. We are there with God and somehow we are in the right space to make decisions because our eyes are focused. We know the beauty of God and we want to be there. We have real desire.

  We all have our unique vocation. We all have a call to follow. It is exciting to trust in our call.

  Do not dramatize it. Listen, and you will know what your next move is. You will experience a desire to do it because it is always a move from fear to love.

  “Come. Come follow me.”

  * * *

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  FOLLOWING JESUS IS following the voice of the One who calls us away from useless wandering or from just sitting there. Jesus says, “Follow me.” If we choose to listen and follow, our life gradually comes into focus. It is no longer tiring. We know where to direct our energies. We know what is important and what is not. Following Jesus means to let go of the “I” and move toward the “other.” Following Jesus means to dare to move out of ourselves and to slowly let go of building our “self” up. It means to be guided by the other who draws us into an entirely new way of being.

  Following does not mean imitating or copying someone’s behavior. I think that sometimes we end up imitating or saying as he or she says, or doing as she or he does. But following Jesus is something other than imitating or copying his way of doing things.

  It is important for us to see this distinction. If we imitate someone we are not developing a personal, intimate relationship with that person. We imitate the person whom we look up to or the person whom we admire and are not close to.

  Sometimes imitation has a quality of fear to it.

  “I am afraid that he or she doesn’t like me, so I am going to imitate what he or she does so that I am acceptable.”

  There is no inner space there.

  Imitating someone can also come from laziness.

  “I am going to do what he or she does, but I am not going to get involved.”

  Somebody who imitates another person doesn’t really get involved with that person. They don’t want an encounter from within.

  In contrast, when we speak about following Jesus we speak about a movement that comes from our heart. It comes from the deepest place of our person. It has something to do with our innermost self. Following Jesus means to live our life in his spirit, in his light, in his heart, but with our spirit, with our light, and with our heart. It doesn’t mean that we become passive imitators. No, it means that we become persons who discover our own vocation, our own unique call, in a whole new way.

  To follow Jesus means to give our unique form and incarnation to God’s love.

  To follow Jesus means to live our lives as authentically as he lived his. It means to give away our ego and to follow the God of Love as Jesus shows us. Following Jesus requires a conversion. It requires a new heart and a new mind.

  There are no two followers of Jesus who are the same. Look at the great variety of saints. They all have their own unique style of discipleship. One of the most exciting aspects of the Christian life is that it does not put people in a mold, but creates a rich variety of people in whom the love of God becomes incarnate in very different ways.

  If following were imitating then there could never be a community. A community is precisely a gathering of those who in different ways have integrated and incorporated the call. The vitality of the Christian community exists precisely because there are so many ways of following Jesus.

  We all reflect God’s love in different ways. Together we are like a mosaic. In a mosaic one stone is bright, another stone is gold, another stone is small. If we look at it closely we can admire the beauty of each stone, but if we step back from it, we can see that all the little stones reveal a beautiful picture and tell a story that none of the stones can tell by itself. Together the different stones reflect the face of God to the world.

  To follow Jesus is to hear his call as a very personal call. It is a call to give a unique witness to the love of God as revealed in Jesus. There are many ways of being disciples so that the fullness of God’s love is visible in the Christian community. For some, this means a call to radical poverty. For others, it means faithfulness in marriage. For others, it means a life of
service in the secular world. For others, it is a life of contemplation and hiddenness. Whatever our personal response is, it is a response of love. It is a way of giving visibility to God’s love. Every disciple reflects something special of God’s love.

  Discipleship—giving expression to God’s love—takes many forms. Some people are passionate lovers. Others have an indignant love. They see injustice and immediately go to it. Others have a very gentle love. They radiate welcoming. Wherever they are they create community. There are others with a quiet love that is very hidden.

  These are all forms of love, and we each have our own way. God’s love is so rich and broad that it takes many people to make it visible. The many forms of love support each other.

  Lord Jesus,

  I come to you to enter into the mystery of your way—the way of discipleship, the way that leads from the cross to new life. It is not an easy way, but it is a way of peace and joy. Help me to be here with a heart open to suffering, a mind open to understanding, and a will ready to follow.

  There are many struggles and I will always have many struggles, but with you, O Lord, I am living in the Light. With you, O Lord, I am moving more and more toward life. With you, O Lord, I know I am safe.

  Let me celebrate my life in a spirit of gratitude. Grateful that I am here and grateful you are my God.

  AMEN

  CHAPTER THREE

  THE CHALLENGE

  “Love Your Enemies”

  “Love your enemies, do good to those who hate you, bless those who curse you, and pray for those who treat you badly. To the one who slaps you on one cheek, present to them the other one too. If someone takes your cloak, do not refuse your tunic. Give to everyone who asks you, and do not ask for your property back from the one who robs you. Treat others as you would like them to treat you. If you love those who love you, what thanks can you expect? Even sinners love those who love them. And if you do good to those who do good to you, what thanks can you expect, for even sinners do that much. And if you lend to those from whom you hope to receive, what thanks can you expect? Even sinners lend to sinners, expecting to get back the same amount. Instead love your enemies and do good, and lend without any hope of return. You will have a great reward and be sons and daughters of the Most High, for God himself is kind to the ungrateful and the wicked.”